Interesting meet - Sports and Science

I had no idea that this evening would turn out to be interesting beyond my imagination. Initially when my cousin invited me for an evening at the London Chess classic meet (obviously in London), I had accepted mainly so because it would be an opportunity to meet and catch up with him.

Being a weekday, I had to plan my day so that I finish work and head to London city (40 min by train). On the morning of the "day" , I was not feeling well , so decided to take it easy. Being inside the cozy confines on my room, I took care of "important and urgent" official emails and then started to contemplate if I should go for the evening meet. At one point, sleep got the better of me. I woke up feeling better and made up my mind to go for the evening meet.

I reached the venue (Olympia center) after an hour's journey, hopping trains 3 times. Made my way upto the conference area. The place was filled with Chess board of all sizes.

People from different parts of the world, 10 yr old to 70 yr old could be seen in groups discussing Chess, strategy, games etc. Needless to say there was a coffee shop at one end of the hall with rows of chairs and tables, most of which were occupied. Not to forget, a shop selling Chess related materials (chess books, puzzles, chess boards, DVD's etc), some of them at a reduced price. I did pick a couple of books :-)

Chess games at different levels were on and the seriousness and concentration on everyone's face was evident from the silent room filled with people.

The most interesting part that held my interest was a talk about Astronomy which was presented by 3 senior chess players. It was interesting to see the connection between astromomy and Chess. For the first time I had come across a seminar on astronomy in a Chess meet. I am still wondering as to what is the common link. The room was 70% filled with audience and online audience listening in/watching , thanks to the technology. The 1 hour session went on for an hour and 20 minutes with folks making it an interactive one.

Finally, definitely the cream of the evening was a meeting with one of the prominent/famous/well-known name in the world of international chess arena who shared his interest in astronomy during the session. The pic should be good enough.

Pobody's Nerfect

If you are thinking that I have misspelt the word, you are in for a surprise. This is known as 'Spoonerism' named after the person who made it famous , William Archbald Spooner.The first time I heard the spooner'd version , I was sure that it was a mistake until I learnt about it in detail. More details on it over here http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spoonerism

Most of us have grown up hearing this phrase (I mean the un-spoonered version), which is "Nobody's Perfect".  And there has been numerous quotes/1-liners based on this. Over a period of time , we gather evidences of 'imperfectness' against people/circumstances and make a perception/view of everything. The majority of time we look at ourselves and see whats "NOT" perfect about us and focus on perfecting that. Also , we receive feedback on how "imperfect" we are in different aspects from different people at different point in time. Our limitless storage device, the brain, stores all these information and off we go "trying" to perfect all or most of the imperfectness. If we pause and take a look at the various things we do, it would be evident that most of the time , its about fixing/changing ourselves or the circumstances or the people around us. Anything wrong or bad about it? No. That's how we have programmed ourselves.

Last week, when I had a meeting with a long time friend of mine, I realised that both (my friend and me) related to one other friend in a fixed way, more so because of the experience that we had with that other person. Very soon we were talking about the imperfection in that person. Later when I went through the entire conversation in my mind, I realised that we had imperfections as well, but we had comfortably forgotten that. Here's where the thinking and the attitude change would make a difference. Before going there , lets look at the dictionary meaning of the word "Perfect". There may be numerous meanings, but the topmost is

Lacking nothing essential to the whole; complete of its nature or kind.

In simple words, however each one or each circumstance is , they are perfect and need no changing or fixing. I know this might not fit into the logical reasoning , but for a minute , imagine if we applied this. 

When I realised that I was relating to my friend in the fixed way, I told myself and the other friend that however people are, they are fine. They are the way they are. When we said that the other friend is perfect the way he/she is, we started to see whole new perspective and our attitude towards that person changed.

This is a simple but effective mechanism, but for this , you should keep away all the past perspectives/views/judgement/evaluation about the other person away and say to yourself that however he/she is , he/she is perfect the way he/she is. I did see a difference and I hope you also see a difference.

Back to School

The long wait (for parents) for the school to re-open has come (for some). Today was the first day of a new class for my son. It was good to see the excitement in him. Getting up early, and getting ready , wearing the new uniform, new bag, new shoes and the new list goes on...

Being the first day of the school , I dropped him off at school. The school campus was abuzz with activity (read confusion) . It was interesting to look at the different reactions/emotions. More than the students, some parents were tensed/nervous . And ofcourse there were some students who were new to the school and some (like my son), graduated from the small campus next door to the bigger one and were in awe of the magnanimity as compared to their smaller campus next door. I could very well understand the emotions that the little ones were going through.. I myself had studied in 7 schools in my 14 yrs (12 + KGs) of schooling and almost every 2 years went through these emotions (maturing each time though)

After running from counter to counter , looking for the right counter to get my son "registered" (basically to mark his presence on the first day of the school) .By the time I could locate the right counter and my turn came, it was time for the Prayer. So, all activities were suspended for the timing of the prayer. Standing there listening to the prayer, I was reminded of my school days, the assembly, prayer, school song, national anthem. Very nostalgic!! and nice :-)

Dealing with upset

Upset is something that all of us have had or having at some point or the other. When we are upset, all we can see is that our point of view is right.

Recently I happened to have an upset with my son. I had to go out for dinner with a few of my friends at work and it required good amount of time considering travelling and the logistics at the restaurant. The minute he knew I was stepping out; he started throwing tantrums and did all possible things to keep me from stepping out. This was normal, so I spent some time with him telling him where I was going and what I needed to do and what time I would be back. But whatever I did, he did not seem to take it well. Time was running out and still I had not started. Finally, I ditched the plan of stepping out, and stayed at home. I was upset at the fact that I could not go out and my plans had been destroyed. I even shouted at my son for not letting me go. He was upset as well, because I was shouting at him and he sat there with a sad look on his face, sometimes crying.

The next day , my son woke up and was back to his normal self, running around , talking to me as if nothing happened. I was still upset with him. Normally I would take my time to get ready . This day , I was up early and got ready early and left home early than usual. When my son came out to see me off, I did not respond to what he was asking, but simply said “Bye” and left. 

This is something we all do when we are upset with someone. Whether it is mom/dad/sibling/special-friend/spouse etc, most of the time we say nothing’s wrong but within ourselves, our world is upside down. We take revenge by not talking or not responding properly, or doing something that we normally don’t do. The actions can vary , but the underlying point is that we tend to prove a point to the other person which amounts to saying “See, I am upset becos of u” and we make sure that the other person feels bad.

Where does this all lead to? Ultimately a strained relationship . I looked back and reflected on what happened , I realized that I was being silly and punishing my son silently for no mistake of his. All he wanted was for me to be with him. I could not understand it at that time.

I went back home and apologised to him and hugged him and gave up my upset.

We always have a choice to hold on to the upset life long or to give it up and create something new in the place of upset. There is nothing right or wrong here, but purely a choice.

Make it Happen

Most of us when we want some work to be done , we analyse if its urgent or important. If it falls in either of the category, then we make sure it gets done at all costs. And there are those tasks which are not of importance, but if that work was done, a sense of satisfaction would be there.  We tend to trade satisfaction because of lack of time or there are lots to be done. The reason may vary and are aplenty.

For me , it was always a desire to be able to wear sunglasses during summer. For those who know me and have seen me, I wear spectacles and a high power one. Removing the specs would make me blind as a bat. I did try out wearing sunglasses, but did not really work out. So, the only way I thought was to get a laser operation done and then wear sunglasses. This process would involve time and money to the extent of INR 35K. This matter became a nice to have and I chose to live with it.

Few weeks back , again these thoughts came. I was driving from Chennai to Bangalore and it was around 2PM, the sun blazing down and reflection all over from the road. That time I felt the real need to have sunglasses and I was determined to make it happen. (BTW, some of my friends have nicknamed me as "MIH" guy aka "Make It happen")

I looked at ways of getting a sunglass which I can use. Finally after less than 2 weeks , I had got a sunglass made which had both power and the sun protection. NowI can drive without having to guess whats in front of me :-D

Disciplined driving... hill driving

Most of us have either driven on the hills or have been in a car/bus going up or down a hill. The roads are narrow, steep at times, and there are these sharp turns called 'hairpin' curves, which require special attention and certain amount of dexterity.

The rule of the hill driving is

1. never overtake on curves 
2. always give way for upward traffic

Most of the time , people drive on hills as they would on the plain terrain. Couple of hours back I was on my way , driving down the hill from Coonoor to Coimbatore. This is 2-lane road and is used by vehicles coming up as well as going down (In some hills, there are separate ways to go up and come down. example Tirupati-tirumala) . 

Its so depressing to know how people drive in the hills. And most of them happened to be educated people. Not toforget are the taxi drivers who know these roads as they have frequently driven , but that does not give them any liberty in breaking the rules of hill driving. 

High time we had different kinds of license/measures to ensure safe journey on the hills. 

Cheers

K

Silence speaks a lot.

Many a times I find myself in a situation where I want to say a lot of things, but then feel its better not to say all those. And I keep thinking whats the best thing to say and finally end up saying nothing. Many a times I do get shouted at for being silent and non-reactive. :-|

Especially when someone loses their close ones , I find it tough to say anything. Most of the things goes on in mind. "What do i say?" , "What do i do?" Whatever I say or do will not necessarily undo anything that has happened. And sometimes , the best way to show you care is to be "Silent".. "Silent" in quotes because, on the external appearance I am quiet, but there is that internal voice which keeps going on and on.

At that moment I feel that I should say something to prove/show that I care. But on the contrary , being silent and jus being with the other person says a lot about the love and care one shows.

Cheers
K

Manic Monday or a Amazing Monday

Hola!!


Was reminded about the song "Just another Manic Monday" by the Bangles group.


Weekend gone and here comes another week. Back to work (or school/college). Ever noticed how quickly the weekend goes? Even before you notice, its gone!! And then we are eagerly waiting for the next weekend to come :-).


If you observe, you would notice that as Friday evening comes closer, most of us are charged up , excited and raring to go :-).Why? Coz the weekend's coming and its party time... And also as Sunday evening approaches, the mood slowly changes (as if getting ready for a war or battle) and all you want to do is sink into the couch and   get rest as much as possible, or start preparing for Monday morning. One classic example is my son. If I ask him to finish off his homework on friday evening, he would say "Dad, tomorrow is saturday. I will do the homework on sunday" :-) .. And on sunday evening, just as he is about to hit the bed, he remembers and it takes a whole lot of effort from all of us to get his homework done :-).


Though I took the example of my son, most of us have similar experiences :-)..


And there are some of them who eagerly look forward for Mondays. For example, couple of years back , I used to look forward to Mondays. I had lots of friends at work and it was fun to be with them. And over the weekends, they had their own stuff to do and since I was staying away from family, I did not have much to do over the weekend. So, ultimately it all boils down to what is the context for the near future.


Imagine, you are supposed to go on a date 2 days from now. From this moment till you actually go out, it would seem that the days are going too slow and you cant wait for 2 more days. On the contrary, consider you are going out of town and would not be meeting the person you love for a month or so, then you would feel that the days are shorter (though in both cases the day is of 24hrs only :-) ) .


So, in short, our actions/emotions/feelings are totally totally based on the context that we have for the near future. It could be an empowering context , which makes u charged up ,excited!! or on the other hand, it could be an dis-empowering context, which could make you sulk ..


Well, another fresh week is here and the world looks bright and beautiful. 


Have a GREAT week ahead :-) and specially to my friend for whom this is a much awaited week.


Cheers
K

Degree Kaapi

It was lunch hour and after a decently long meeting, I was looking forward to have a sumptuous lunch. As i was driving through the roads of chennai, I realised that I was near Mylapore, and the obvious choice of eatery was the famous Karpagambal mess.

So, off I went navigating the always-oh-so-crowded mada street until I reached the destination. As I sat there, waiting for my food to arrive, I happened to notice the price list that was put up on the wall. I started going through each item in that list. I stopped at the third one which read "Degree Kaapi" . 

I have heard the term quite a number of times (thanks to my Grandma) , but never really ventured to find more about it. Sitting here , waiting for food and nothing better to do, I did a search for "Degree coffee" on my mobile. What I found was really interesting which i will share in a moment.

In this age of "Coffee Days", "Barista", "Java City", I think its a good idea to know a bit about Coffee or Kaapi.

So, I had this question "Why is it called Degree Kaapi". Came across a few explanations . 

1) Coffee prepared with "degree" milk (milk of good quality as measured by a lactometer) was called degree coffee

2)  when coffee is decocted for the first time, it is called as the first degree or simply as the "Degree Coffee".

My thoughts and reading was interrupted by the arrival of my food :-)

There is a whole lot of detail that is available @ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Indian_filter_coffee.

Kaapi enjoy maadi

Cheers

K

Awaiting Eagerly......

I am sure most of us have had this experience at one point or other. The presence of a loved one is most felt in his/her absence. I am going through that experience right now. Its vacation time , Schools shut , that time of the year when kids have a gala time and parents (well most of them), otherwise :-) ..

Its hardly been 3-4 days since my son has gone on vacation to his G'pa's place, and it seems that he has gone for a longer time. Much of the time he was here, we were mostly wrestling over something , sometimes playing, some good times, some otherwise.. And now when he is gone on vacation (even if its for a few days), the void created cannot be explained but only experience . This is true with every relationship, especially if the other person is someone whom we dearly love :-) .. Interestingly , that person is more often in our thoughts when they are away. More because we are thinking if they are thinking about us, or maybe not, missing us or not..Whatever it is, i know he is having a good time at his G'Pa's..

I remember a similar incident that happened a few years ago when my son was 3 yrs old and I had returned home after spending a month away from home. I guess these little ones have instincts. He was there at the doorsteps even before I could ring the doorbell :-) .. I still remember that moment. On seeing me , he jus came running and hugged me tight . He held on for a good minute or two .. Amazing!!! mabbe as kids we would have done the same.. Somewhere in the process of growing up , we have suppressed that display of affection ..

Waiting for the day when he would be back from his vacation.. ( and we can resume what we were doing.. having fun) ..

Cheers
K

Celebrating Women's day

International Womens day is being observed on Mar 8th for a long time now. Since 1911 to be precise. What started as a political move has now lost most of the political flavor and has given way for people to express their love and gratitude for all the women in their life.


It surely has caught up in India as well. I know of a few friends of mine who argue that they dont need a "women's day" to show affection. Some feel its more of commercial value. Anyways, will leave that aside for now.


I was driving back home from work and spent a good amount of time inching my way through the city traffic, and during this time i notice atleast 20 women having either a gift box or a bouquet of flowers in their hand. And corporate houses doing their bit to encourage and promote this.


Multiple thoughts ran across my mind and I realised that though we (read men mostly) have deep respect/gratitude towards women, we dont express it , or sometimes the expression of love is just being silent ;-) , and here is an opportunity to express that gratitude/love towards the women (spouse/mother/sisters/friends) in our lives.


To all the women in my life, I love u and grateful for the contribution you make to my life.


Be right Back :-)

Collections with a difference

When I was growing up, I was fond of collecting stamps. So much so that I lost count of the albums I had. God only knows where they are now. And I remember 6 out of 10 people had the same interest at that point in time.

However , Its interesting to know and see people who have passion for collecting things with a difference. For instance, an ex-colleague of mine used to collect spoons and had a display of all the spoons he collected from all over the world. I reckon he would have a huge collection by now. Another intersting collection which one of my relatives has is collection of  "Ganesha" . As of now the count stands at 168, Ganesha in various forms and shapes :-), which makes me conclude that Ganesha is the most customised god :-) ..Interestingly , save for a  few. most of the collectibles of this collection (of Ganesha) have been gifted by someone or the other :-)

Here are few pictures from the collection. The best one that i liked is "Ganesha in a crystal"

Learning from Kids - Being unstoppable

This is something I always love. observing kids in what they do and how they learn things. And interestingly , they pick up most of the things from parents (and we wonder "where did u learn that from?"). My son is very good at immitating his mom :-P (some mannerism, speaking etc)

One thing I observed and learnt today is "being unstoppable". Here's how it all went about.

One of his friends at play home had made a paper toy (he calls it scary finger). He wanted another one of the similar kind and asked me to do it. I looked up from my laptop screen and shrugged indicating "I dont know how to do it". what happened next took me by real sweet surprise. My son fishes out his school diary from his bag, ruffles through the pages with a serious look on his face and after some time comes to me holding a page open and says "This is his number (that guy's dad'ss number). call him and ask him" . I was like "waattttt, noo way.. not at 10 in the night". My son almost took the phone and started dialing which is when I sprung into action  of cajoling , convincing. Realising that it did not go through well, I offered to make something else, but he was clear about what he wanted (and something that I did not know to make) ..So, I had to do find means of doing it. Did some reverse engineering on the already done toy and managed to make a similar one. And boy, was he happy to see it?? loved the expression on his face :-)

Bottom line .. when something appears to be urgent, we find one way or other to make it happen. Only thing is most of the things in life are important to us, but not urgent and we keep postponing it till it becomes urgent :-)

Ciao

K

A different world vs a world with a difference

A few days back I was out doing some photography for a project that my wife has taken up. This project is about making basic public services easily accessible for the physically challenged folks. My job was to go around and get pics of the public places that are near to the place where I live.

To give a brief background, even before starting this work I have been associated in empowering the physically challenged folks in one way or other. One instance was when I was a scribe in an examination for a visually-challenged person whom I had not known until the day before his examination. The point I want to make here is that it was not a new thing for me to do this sort of stuff.


Coming back to this project, I started to go around my neighborhood and began capturing pictures of places like parks, school, places of worship,restaurants,public toilets, bus stand and so on.


It took me a good deal of time to go around and in the process visited a number of each type of the above mentioned categories, and it was one eye-opener for me. 


Imagine you going to your favorite restaurant for a meal. The restaurant is on the first floor. There is one small hurdle. There is only one way u can get to the first floor (no stairs, no elevator), a rope which hangs from the first floor. That would probably be the last time you ever went that side (to that restaurant). THAT is the level of accessibility that is available for the physically challenged folks in most of the places that I mentioned. Most of the places have steps, including most of the public parks and places of worship, which is a hindrance to the physically challenged person. Shockingly , some of the smaller health care centers are not equipped with easy access for physically challenged people.

There are rules and policies for each and everything to be  "easy to access" , but most of the times these are on paper. In reality, its a dream come true.

There are lots of organisation doing good amount of work in their best possible capacity. But the need is for more hands to join to make a big difference.


What is the message that we are communicating without saying?? How do all of us look at people with physical challenges?


How would it be to make a difference to atleast 1 specially abled person (if not daily) atleast once a month? it could be doing anything that makes a difference, brings a smile to them.


Jaago!